focus.

i need to focus.

i'm scared. ㅠ.ㅠ

i need to breathe.

i'm so panic.

why? i've been taking exams for the past 20 years(minus 5 maybe) of my life. why the fear now.

....................

zz..

For those who wants to 'korbankan' me or would like to turn me into a camel steak.

weehehe~~

i'm fat. so if you eat me you know the consequences.

proof that i'm fat --> the screw from my chair comes off every now and then. i'm still waiting for the day that i fall flat off my chair because the screw kept coming off for god's sake. am i too heavy? T_T

done with 3.

just one more freaking paper to go. Macroeconomics2.

i want to slack. but i know that is something i cannot afford to do because Macro2 is like seriously a tough nut to crack.

T.T

so far exams have been fair. i doubt i'll fail any. but still. sometimes you just cannot make assumptions.

updates later.

gotta run.

winter! winter!!

may i now declare the official beginning of winter.

taking in the cool crisp chilly air feels so good..but only for a few minutes..after that..when the wind starts blowing right in front of your face slapping against your cheeks. you just want to faint and wished you'd stayed at home hiding under your blanket.

it's 2 a.m now. is 2 am the coldest time of the day? maybe not..but anyway i can hear wind blowing through the window gap. you may find it eerie. but i think it's pretty soothing. i used to find it scary really..

i'm not sleepy surprisingly but i know i need to sleep soon. and i need to wake up early. can't waste much time sleeping. sleep 8 hours. still sleepy. sleep 10 hours. still sleepy. sleep 6 hours. still sleepy. sleep 4 hours. still sleepy.
anyhow i will feel sleepy and the only solution is coffee.

oh. did i tell you i think i have 2 freaking ulcers in my mouth. okay 1 is confirmed ulcer because it's obvious..another..i think i can only confirm it in another 24 hours' time. God...it hurts.
i didn't even enjoy my good plate of Nasi Lemak Kelantan though it was real good. and at least it's something pretty authentic i would say. ikan bilis, my love...sorry i did not enjoy you as much as i'm supposed to...i even teared a little when i had you. because you were salty and you hurt my ulcer so badddd. argh~!!!

anyway.

i need to rest anyhow after finishing one more tiny part of this lecture note.

so good night people.

good or bad

my internet died since .. day before yesterday. one more week till recovery date.

did it die on purpose so that i can concentrate on my studies more...? perhaps.

but even without it i lose concentration too often. my mind just drifts itself off into space. oh i see stars. oh i see the moon. oh i'm floating.

see?

cut the crap.

there's something that concerns everyone here in melbourne at the moment. the swine head..damn..not swine head..wtf is swine head..my god. pig head? boar head? okay..anyway,it's the swine flu..seems like the cases are escalating day by day. which is getting pretty scary. maybe it's time to wear a mask when going out? @.@ i'd better stay home.

and i should opt for walking instead of taking public transports. really, i see people sneezing, sniffing or coughing in the trams/trains way too often these days.

oh no. i think i went to a public place just now. and i shouldn't have. grabbed a cup of coffee from starbucks with my housemate. damn..and walked one round in DFO..all of a sudden i felt a need for shopping. but i know this is not the right time.. T.T

enough..enough..back to work.

T.T

@.@

i hope you understand my disappearance for <----------------this long ------------------->

sometimes i really want to keep my blog alive but it's just so hard. few times i've opened up the page 'Create Post'. yet there's no updates. really sorry. at times, my mind is pure blank as a result from my lifeless life. at times, i do have the urge to crap some crap but then something comes up and it kind of distracted me. So i just can't be bothered to pen it down anymore. i wonder if you've experienced that. or is it just me that get distracted so easily.

now that Ciara's back to M'sia. There really is nothing i look forward to anymore...life's back to locking my pitiful self in the room only.
T.T

as you know the Exam Craze is here. everyone's going to start mugging and 'eating' up their books. oh wait...the exam craze doesn't apply to everyone. because i knew people who're exceptionally free during this period. hahahaha. plus one having a 4-months-break. owh..so jealous... T.T

please God help me get through this...i swear to God i won't swear to God anymore. just help me~!! er...did i just say...okay whatever. really.

at least grant me back my perfect health...my brains cannot function very well with this sick body of mine.

oh did i mention my heart was beating real fast when i went to the clinic today. i was really scared they'll put me under quarantine for swine flu. T.T i'm not acting stupid okay...seriously..almost drop dead because i was kind of panicky. but obviously nothing happened if not i wouldn't be blogging now. just had mild sore throat it seems. but doesn't feel like it's mild... o.O
at least he didn't just ask me to go get panadol or else... i would look like a fool going to the clinic just to get prescription for panadol. -_-'
the thing is i felt so sick after taking the antibiotics..or maybe it's not the antibiotics? don't know. i shall try tomorrow and see what happens.

hmm..maybe i should continue studying. i've been going really slow with reading i just don't understand why. even slower than a slow poke, really. sigh..i need to speed up or else i'll be screwed.

oh i've got a good company with me while studying..there's this korean radio which i can listen online. filled with good old+new kpop. hehe..i wouldn't even want to go to the library to study because of this. ^^

alright..back to my lec notes.

you might have to wait....forever before the next update.

sorry in advance then.